On Tuesday morning, I got to go have an interview with a shrink at 7:00AM! Much as I'm sure I have needed it, I have never been a psychiatric patient. Quiet, you guys- I can hear the snickers already. Anyway, in order to be considered for a transplant, one has to be considered sane & in touch with reality. Dr. Vobach was 5 minutes late to our appointment, but he was so cute & friendly, and excused his tardiness by blaming it on one of his childrens' toys being in the driveway (I could relate, although it's been a few years), that I forgave him on the spot. He was the friendliest doctor I met, all in all. Not at all what I was expecting. When he basically told me that all he needed to do was establish that I was "within the normal parameters of sanity", I asked him if perhaps anyone who opts to have his heart, or lungs removed & changed out for someone else's with no real guarantees might not be "within those normal parameters". He laughed and agreed. We went back over my physical & mental history. It is only at times like these that I remember the assault and think to mention it- and then when I do, the person who is listening is so genuinely horrified that I almost wish I hadn't said anything. But he wanted to know about each & every "significant life event", so I could hardly leave that one out. As I left, he asked me if I thought I needed any drugs- and I recalled that I was getting low on my "baby Xanax" (.25mg per pill). They were prescribed to counteract some of my stress, and I was put on 3 per day. That turned me into such a zombie that I dropped the first 2 doses and just take one at night. But Stratton & Brian have found that if they give their dog Lucy one or two before traveling from Dallas to Beaumont, it definitely helps her calm down & sleep, so I've doled out a few that way- anyway, I needed some more, and he cheerfully gave me a script. I told him how surprised I was that all my doctors accept my taking that drug without a second thought- because I hear it mentioned in the "Holy Trinity" of drugs that are routinely abused. Dr. Vorbach said the same thing Dr. Holland did- yes, but we are talking about multiple milligrams- not one-quarter of one. Anyway, it does help me put all this out of my mind at the end of a day & I think I sleep better. So that was the uneventfully pleasant visit to my mental health professional. After that, the rest of the day until about 4:00 was spent in the building that is specifically devoted to the transplant program. Bettie & I met with Wendy Peavy, the Director, and her assistant Lainey. Following that, I met & was interviewed & examined by Dr. Ring, the surgeon. I really liked him- again, I've not met many surgeons with a good "bedside manner", and I chalk it up to the fact that they do what they do best when you are unconscious, so developing a bedside manner isn't high on their priority list. This guy had it, though. He also had a poster-size photograph of a professional flutist whose heart he had replaced, enabling her to play again. I told him that I hadn't played professionally since I was in high school & was paid $50 per rehearsal and $100 per concert to play with the Beaumont Symphony Orchestra, but that giving up my flute-playing had been a big loss. I guess it is possible that I might play again with new lungs that work- at one time, when I was both singing & playing the flute, I had very good breath control, but sadly, it is completely gone now.
After we saw Dr. Ring, we visited with the Social Worker. They really don't leave any bases uncovered! In retrospect, I'm not sure what the Social Worker does, aside from the fact that she offered me a contract to sign that said I would follow the rules of the program. I signed. I am compliant. Then we matriculated on to the Dietician. She was interested in the fact that I have had a rapid weight loss- I wouldn't call it extremely rapid, but it is definitely in response to my stress and depression and not the result of trying. However, I guess the good part is that I needed to lose the weight. And so now, I am back where I truly thought I'd never be again- size 10 slacks with no elastic!! I'm a true "apple" in that deal about apples & pears. All my extra weight goes straight to my middle, so that when I'm carrying around 20 or 25 extra pounds, my measurements are approximately 36-36-36. I am fortunatel, I guess, that when I do shed weight, it comes off my belly- because I have read all about how dangerous belly fat is. Oh well, that's one thing I don't have to worry about now. As strange as it seems, I forget to eat. I have no appetite except for first thing in the morning. Therefore, I usually eat twice per day, and I am trying to add some healthy snacks in between and at bedtime to keep my weight about where it is & not lose much more.
The final tests on Tuesday were an EKG and an echocardiogram, and for that I had to go all the way back to another building- with Bettie's expert help, I made it, and that took us up til 5:30 once again. This time, however, we had food with us, so between tests or consults I could eat a banana or a protein bar or whatever. And always, always, I have my big blue glass of water on ice. The oxygen dries out my nose & throat so badly that I just drink non-stop, which means I am on the lookout for a ladies room whenever I change buildings. We made our way back to our little nest at Twice Blessed House & said our prayers of gratitude for another safe day. And here I will stop until tomorrow.
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